Holding My Head

I sit here silent
I listen to
The music playing
In my head

Can't get the words out
Can't make them rhyme
But I want to hear it
Just one more time

If I could move it
Out of my head
Into my hands
This misery would end

I could open
Up my soul
I could play
And let you know

Each instrument
Clear and sharp
So harmonic
Floods my heart

Time to time
The sound will swell
Relieve my soul ache
Deliver me from hell

Lost expression
Voiceless cries
Silent desperation
In the dark of my mind

Tempestuous poison
In my veins
Words stop coming
Sound swells again

And as this torture
Continues on
I wish you could hear
This dieing song

So much inside
Without a voice
Without a reason
Without a choice

In a cage
Trapped by doubt
Ravaged by self hatred
A whispered shout

Words stumble
Over the melody
It is not what
I intended to be

Too many apparitions
Confuse my heart
A cloud of admonitions
Diffuse the art

The music fades...
Only a beat remains
The percussion exit
Leaving an empty stage

Welcome the silence
With nervous dread
Again I stumble
Holding my head